


Side Effects

by sabinelagrande



Category: Big Bang Theory
Genre: Aphrodisiacs, Fuck Or Die, Multi, Public Sex, Sex Pollen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-03-25
Updated: 2008-03-25
Packaged: 2017-10-06 10:46:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/52850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sabinelagrande/pseuds/sabinelagrande
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was just like every other night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Side Effects

It was just like every other night.

"Hey guys," Penny said cheerfully as she opened the door to the apartment.

"Hi, Penny," Leonard responded, looking up at her. Sheldon merely waved a hand imperiously at her, not leaving his work.

"What's that?" she asked, walking behind them and peering down at the mass of beakers and tubing on the table.

"Science," Sheldon snapped.

Penny rolled her eyes. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," he replied, without a trace of malice in his voice.

"It's just a little experiment," Leonard explained. "Nothing fancy."

"I'll leave you to it," she said.

"Thanks for dropping by," Leonard told her, watching her walk back towards the door.

"Hey!" Sheldon shouted, and Leonard looked down in time to see that he was spilling the contents of his test tube into entirely the wrong flask.

"Sorry," he said quickly, just as Penny opened the door, but Sheldon only made a noise of discontent, putting his pen down. He looked down at his watch. "I'm late for rehearsal- I'll clean up when I get home, alright?"

"Fine," Sheldon sighed, petulantly gathering up his materials.

\--

It was just like every other night, except that Penny was getting awfully warm.

She sat uncomfortably on her sofa, trying in vain to focus on what she was reading; it should have been easier than it was, considering she'd been staring at the same page for ten minutes. With her free hand, she fanned herself with her shirt collar, but it wasn't helping.

Annoyed, she threw her book aside, stalking to the refrigerator. Opening the freezer, she pulled out an ice cube, pressing it to the back of her neck in hopes of bringing the heat down. After a few seconds, she pulled back her hand, only to find that the ice was completely melted.

Well, that couldn't be a good sign.

There was a knock at the door.

\--

It was just like every other night, until Sheldon ran the calculations.

He knew something was amiss when he spent three whole minutes trying to think of a simple word- antitranscendentalism- that should have come to him immediately. He had known that there would be a very small chance- negligible, really- that something would go wrong.

He really should have checked immediately, but he had been too annoyed at the time to even think about it- which should have been another clue, he thought to himself as he scribbled the equations on his white board.

He checked them. Rechecked them. And then he checked them again, despite the fact that at this point, he was much more likely to introduce an error than find one. It couldn't possibly be right, but it absolutely had to be.

Leaving his work, he walked across the hall, pounding on the opposite door.

\--

It was just like every other night, but then Leonard came home.

He hadn't been feeling right since the middle of rehearsal. It felt like his clothes had shrunk, or maybe his skin was just too tight. The stairs seemed murderously long tonight, and he was very much looking forward to taking a cold shower and passing out.

If you had asked him what he was expecting to see when he stepped up onto the landing outside his apartment, his responses would have been fairly predictable. Nowhere on the list, however, would what was actually happening have appeared.

Sheldon pressed someone- maybe slammed was a better word- up against the wall outside Penny's apartment. Whoever it was- definitely a woman- threw a leg around his waist, drawing him closer. Sheldon bent his head down, biting at her neck, and she moaned loudly, encouraging him on with needy little panting sounds.

Leonard was in the process of mentally congratulating him, when he realized that it was Penny that was making those noises.

Normally, his reaction, quite honestly, would have been to go inside, possibly lock himself in his room, and write about it on his livejournal. But his head was pounding, and he was feeling more than a little bit aggressive, for some reason.

"What the hell!" he shouted, and Sheldon turned, very nearly dropping Penny on the floor.

"Oh good," he replied. "You're home."

"What are you doing?" Leonard demanded, stomping closer.

"He can explain," Penny said, her voice coming out low and breathy.

"You damn well better!"

Sheldon looked between the two of them, before rolling his eyes. "Are you really getting jealous over something I'm doing with your not-girlfriend to save both of our lives?"

Leonard frowned, not particularly liking the sound of that. "Apparently."

"Look, there isn't any time for this," Sheldon protested. He sighed huffily, releasing Penny only to pull Leonard towards him. The touch of his skin felt like an electric shock, but it was nothing like the feeling of Sheldon's lips against his. It certainly wasn't the most skillful kiss Leonard had ever received, but that didn't stop him feeling like he was going to come in his pants right there.

He could only convince himself to pull away when his lungs were aching for oxygen. "The experiment," Leonard gasped, his addled brain putting the pieces together finally. "We have to warn everyone in the building."

Penny grabbed him by the hand, setting off a whole new flurry of sparks. "If they're missing this, they might as well be dead anyway."

"You're the one who spilled TAG into it," Sheldon called, carefully folding his shirt as he walked into the bedroom. "You tell them."

Penny dragged him into her apartment, closing the door behind them.

It was just like every other night.

Until it wasn't.


End file.
